In female athletics (male too), errors, mistakes, and missteps are inevitable. For female athletes, the pressure to perform can sometimes feel overwhelming, leading to self-doubt when things don’t go as planned.
However, regaining confidence after a mistake is key to future success, both in sports and in life.
If you are a coach who values helping your female athletes in regaining her confidence after setbacks, this is for you!
Below are some strategies that can help female athletes rebuild their confidence and turn setbacks into stepping stones.
1. Encouraging Positive Self-Talk is important for regaining confidence
One of the most powerful tools for regaining confidence is positive self-talk. When an athlete makes a mistake, it’s common for them to get trapped in a negative mental loop.
Phrases like, “I’m not good enough,” or “I always mess up,” can dominate their thoughts.
Encourage female athletes to replace these with positive affirmations. Phrases like, “I can do this, I am willing to learn” or “I am strong & capable, I can grow from this” help shift focus from Critical to Creative.
The key is to remind them that mistakes do not define their abilities or potential.
2. Shift her Focus to Effort & Energy vs End-Result
It’s no secret, sports culture often glorifies outcomes—winning, scoring, or breaking records.
However, focusing solely on outcomes can create immense pressure and erode confidence. Encouraging female athletes to focus on effort, energy and improvement over the end-result helps them understand that mistakes are part of the process.
When athletes see value in hard work, even if it doesn’t immediately translate to success, they’ll be less likely to lose confidence after a mistake.
3. Normalize Mistakes outside of “the gameday” to start regaining her confidence
It’s important for coaches, teammates, and mentors to normalize mistakes as part of the learning process.
When female athletes see that even the best players make errors, they realize that perfection is not the goal—progress is.
Share stories of athletes who overcame mistakes and adversity to reach success. This helps foster a mindset where mistakes are not seen as failures but as opportunities for growth.
Get ‘reps in’ before game-day, so that when mistakes happen on game-day, it isn’t the first experience.
One of my favorite ways to normalize mistakes, is to create opportunities for them to fail. For example, the intention is for them to go or drill, till they FAIL. The “F” Word that scares them, now becomes the destination to reach.
4. Break the Cycle of Comparison
In a world of social media and constant comparison, female athletes may feel like they’re falling short compared to others, especially after making a mistake.
Breaking this cycle of comparison is crucial for confidence-building. Help athletes focus on their personal progress and achievements rather than constantly measuring themselves against others. Every athlete’s journey is different, and progress looks different for everyone.
Comparing ourselves is completely normal and to be expected, but when we can do it from a place of “If she can’t I CAN” vs “If she can, I can’t”, then we will win every time.
5. Encourage Growth & Gains
Cultivating a growth mindset is one of the most effective ways to help female athletes regain confidence.
A growth mindset sees challenges and mistakes as opportunities to improve, rather than as evidence of failure.
Athletes with this mindset are more likely to take risks, try new strategies, and ultimately improve. By encouraging a growth mindset, coaches and mentors can help athletes view mistakes as a natural part of their development.
When we focus on the growth and gains versus the lack and gaps, our athletes will bounce back quicker. It may take some reps, but you will start to see the change.
Conclusion
Helping female athletes regain confidence after a mistake is about more than just overcoming the moment—it’s about building resilience, self-awareness, and a growth mindset that will carry them through future challenges.
By fostering an environment that encourages positive self-talk, normalizes failure and mistakes and encourages athletes to focus on growth and gains versus lack and gaps, female athletes can turn setbacks into opportunities to grow stronger and more confident in their abilities.
In the end, I truly believe that mistakes are not roadblocks but small stepping stones to great successes, in sport and in life.
You can read my other blogs today too:
Coaching Female Athletes-The Art & Science or Coaching Girls Effectively-3 Tips
If you are looking to expand your knowledge in regaining her confidence after setbacks, we (at the IYCA) have
partnered with the Tucker Center for Research on Girls & Women in Sports to provide you with FREE Access to CoachingHER.
Coaching HER is a coaching resource that helps sport coaches of girls challenge the status quo and the taken-for-granted assumptions of what it means to coach girls.
Coaching HER tackles central and unaddressed issues which negatively impact girls’ and women’s performance, self-perceptions, sport choices, and experiences: coaches’ unconscious gender biases and stereotypes.
Julie Hatfield-Still
Julie is an Entrepreneur, CEO, Coach and Author. She is the President & Founder of the Non-Profit Beyond The Game Alliance. In addition to her work as a business consultant and coach of coaches, leaders and entrepreneurs. Julie is a Speed Development Specialist and Inner-Game Coach in the college, high school and youth levels.